Thank you for your thoughtful response, I have much respect for what you do and how you help people.
I also, didn’t know about your daughter. I will keep her in my prayers and just to let you know, that she may someday ask you the same questions I am asking. I have found the common questions people who suffer physically tend to ask is “Why me”. We live in separate states but I can already appreciate your experience as I am a father of 3 children and I understand how powerful a fathers love is.

This is a little long, so I appreciate your time:

To make sure I understood your answer, I read your blog a couple of times. Please know that I appreciate your quick responds to my inquiry. I also understand that not all things are 100% clear (right now) for me. I am 100% on board with your response and how can I disagree with scripture. Most of all I appreciate your attempt to help me. If I could side step for a minute; Paul had a prayer for the Ephesians in 1:18 “I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, 19 and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength 20 he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, 21 far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every name that is invoked, not only in the Present age but also in the one to come.

The fact that I have seen the hand of God protect/watch over me in the middle of my trials (or in this Present age) he has given me much comfort throughout the years and yes, the verse you quoted Romans 8:28 has brought me through many difficult times. I have seen the verse above come by me especially when speaking of seeing God’s power and his mighty strength as he carried me through some of the darkest moments in my life. I have held on to the faith that all of this will amount to something good. That faith has been a shield for me and has allowed me to see some great things thus far in life, for example: On our first date, God revealed to my wife and I that we were to be married! We were engaged on our 2nd date and married 4 months later. Now we have 3 beautiful children and have been together for 16yrs. We, like the verses you mentioned have not been exempt from our trials but my point is that I met the awesome power of Christ spirit when I believed. Paul later commanded that “We don’t get drunk with wine, which leads to debauchery but instead be filled with the Spirit”. Around this same time, God introduced me to the commandment of this verse and that it wasn’t something he suggested but it was a commandment that I be filled with his Spirit. I couldn’t move forward in my Christian life without following God’s commandment. It was very different from my logical thinking life experience I had up until this point, but one thing I couldn’t deny afterwards, this verse became very real to me.

He revealed the power of his mighty strength to me each time I made it through another brain surgery for Hydrocephalus. It’s a rare disease that has no known cure, just shunts they implant into the brain to help CSF fluid drain. 1 in 500 babies are born with this disease and 1 in millions acquires it later on during life. That is my scenario. Not many people even know about it but currently approx 1 million people in America suffer from it and possibly someone at your church has directly or indirectly dealt with the trauma of it. I feel very blessed and please don’t get my inquiries wrong. I have basically come to the most vulnerable place in my adult life. A place of total and complete dependence on the one who created me…

I have been pretty fulfilled up until this point. It started when he gave me a vision when I was 19yrs old of speaking in front of a large group of people, ministering to them. 2yrs ago, I led a team of 150 customer service agents into offering our products to our customers in a honest way and He rewarded our sales by moving them from 74% to 130% to goal and shooting over goal by $800k+. I didn’t even realize what had happened until the year was well over and was recognized by our Director (I work for a major Wireless Provider). He has shown me his grace and power as I prayed for my customers when I was in customer service and his grace and power as a coach.

So back to your points:

I agree with you, but my experience has taught me that life would throw me a curve ball, I would catch it and do whatever I wanted to with it, and when I chose to be positive and not let it impact my attitude (negatively), it impacted where he took me next. Now after going through 19 major surgeries, getting engaged to my wife on my first date, having 3 beautiful children, seeing God place his powerful hand on my work, my question how are we to enter back into that place of rest again?

To wrap this up, maybe in my mind I want it to be all over with by now, since I have come such long way over the past 19yrs, and I just want a little rest or enjoy a little fun in the sun so to say. I understand what has caused this world to suffer, but my experience caused me to step in the river years ago of Jesus’ Holy Spirit and one minute in the River removed years of pain from the struggles of all I had been through.

So after all of that do you know how one can simply step into the River at any time? It seems I remember it just overtaking me like the floods in the MO right now. I didn’t have to do much, and he just flooded me with his power and healing… Now 19yrs later, and much struggles again, I guess I am on that same path again. From your experience, how does someone revisit an old friend that has done so much to transform his life?
Thank you again for your time,
Kyle aka Brenner

Eph 5: 17 Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is. 18 Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit,
Again, thank you for your time,

I agree with you, that what you did was not a failure to love. I may have taken a different approach: “Sure, you and anyone you know can park on my lawn, for a small fee. Then you could make a profit, tithe ten percent, the church makes a profit, and the man is still happy. Hey, it’s a win-win situation.”